{"id":1964,"date":"2013-01-08T09:00:58","date_gmt":"2013-01-08T17:00:58","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.bepreparedperiod.com\/blog\/?p=1964"},"modified":"2021-09-22T10:34:05","modified_gmt":"2021-09-22T10:34:05","slug":"owning-your-beautiful-body-at-menopause-for-the-sake-of-your-daughter-at-puberty","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bepreparedperiod.com\/blog\/owning-your-beautiful-body-at-menopause-for-the-sake-of-your-daughter-at-puberty\/","title":{"rendered":"Owning Your Beautiful Body (at Menopause) for the Sake of Your Daughter (at Puberty)"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>By <a title=\"Jessica Drummond\" href=\"http:\/\/jessicadrummond.com\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Jessica Drummond<\/a>, MPT, CCN, CHC<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bepreparedperiod.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/01\/Owning-Your-Beautiful-Body-at-Menopause-for-the-Sake-of-Your-Daughter-at-Puberty-e1357441132223.jpg?ssl=1\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" data-attachment-id=\"1972\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/www.bepreparedperiod.com\/blog\/owning-your-beautiful-body-at-menopause-for-the-sake-of-your-daughter-at-puberty-2\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bepreparedperiod.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/01\/Owning-Your-Beautiful-Body-at-Menopause-for-the-Sake-of-Your-Daughter-at-Puberty-e1357441132223.jpg?fit=350%2C241&amp;ssl=1\" data-orig-size=\"350,241\" data-comments-opened=\"1\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;0&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"Owning Your Beautiful Body (at Menopause) for the Sake of Your Daughter (at Puberty)\" data-image-description=\"&lt;p&gt;Top view of mother and daughter relaxing on grass and smiling with hands behind head&lt;\/p&gt;\n\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-medium-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bepreparedperiod.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/01\/Owning-Your-Beautiful-Body-at-Menopause-for-the-Sake-of-Your-Daughter-at-Puberty-e1357441132223.jpg?fit=300%2C207&amp;ssl=1\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bepreparedperiod.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/01\/Owning-Your-Beautiful-Body-at-Menopause-for-the-Sake-of-Your-Daughter-at-Puberty-e1357441132223.jpg?fit=350%2C241&amp;ssl=1\" class=\"alignleft size-full wp-image-1972\" title=\"Owning Your Beautiful Body (at Menopause) for the Sake of Your Daughter (at Puberty)\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bepreparedperiod.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/01\/Owning-Your-Beautiful-Body-at-Menopause-for-the-Sake-of-Your-Daughter-at-Puberty-e1357441132223.jpg?resize=350%2C241&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"Owning Your Beautiful Body (at Menopause) for the Sake of Your Daughter (at Puberty)\" width=\"350\" height=\"241\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bepreparedperiod.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/01\/Owning-Your-Beautiful-Body-at-Menopause-for-the-Sake-of-Your-Daughter-at-Puberty-e1357441132223.jpg?w=350&amp;ssl=1 350w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bepreparedperiod.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/01\/Owning-Your-Beautiful-Body-at-Menopause-for-the-Sake-of-Your-Daughter-at-Puberty-e1357441132223.jpg?resize=300%2C207&amp;ssl=1 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 350px) 100vw, 350px\" \/><\/a>Isn\u2019t it funny that God designed moms to hit menopause just as their daughters are hitting puberty.\u00a0 (Well, actually, I guess we\u2019ve designed it that way, since now many of us are having our children well into our perimenopausal years.\u00a0 But, wait\u2026 My grandmother had her last child at 40.\u00a0 So, I don\u2019t know who to blame!)<\/p>\n<p>Think about that for a moment.<\/p>\n<p><strong><em>Just when you\u2019re feeling even worse about your body, the perimenopausal belly fat, the sagging well-past-breastfeeding breasts, the bits of gray hair, the middle aged acne, all combined with the fatigue that comes from raising tweens and burning the candle at both ends for the last 3 decades, it\u2019s your job to combat 6000 negative media messages everyday about the unattainable perfect female body!\u00a0 Ugh. <!--more--><br \/>\n<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n<p>In the midst of your own hormonal haywire, you\u2019ve now got to be the body image superstar.\u00a0 You must model feeling amazing in your skin in the face of photoshopped supermodels!\u00a0 You\u2019ve got to hold your breath, hide your embarrassment, and confidently talk to your daughter about her sexuality, healthfully, lovingly, and in a way that will help her to feel great in her skin.\u00a0 You must do all of this for the sake of your daughter\u2019s fledging adult woman identity for she is just now stepping into her adult woman body for the very first time.\u00a0 And, you, Mom, are her best guide.<\/p>\n<p>This is a nearly impossible task for any Mom.\u00a0 Alone.<\/p>\n<p>But, together, we can break through the thickest glass ceiling that still exists for our daughters.\u00a0 The lack of feeling at home in our bodies is holding women back.\u00a0 And, it\u2019s time that we break through for the sake of our girls.<\/p>\n<p>The research is very clear about a mother\u2019s role in her daughter\u2019s healthy body image development, especially at puberty.\u00a0 A mothers\u2019 drive for thinness is a direct predictor of her daughter\u2019s increased risk of having an eating disorder<sup>1<\/sup>.\u00a0 A mother\u2019s body dissatisfaction is associated with her daughter\u2019s body dissatisfaction especially if she participates in a non-esthetic sport, like cross-country or softball<sup> 2<\/sup>.\u00a0 (Surprisingly for esthetic sports like gymnastics this effect was not as clear.)\u00a0 However, in other research<sup>3<\/sup>, girls who participate in esthetic sports tend to desire to be much thinner (even if they are already thin) and a girl\u2019s body dissatisfaction is predicted by her mother\u2019s habit to restrict her own eating and her mother\u2019s perfectionism.<\/p>\n<p>Beyond just modeling our own body self-love, we must be acutely aware of what we say to our girls.\u00a0 Multiple studies<sup>4,5<\/sup> have shown that comments that parents (and often mothers in particular) make about their daughter\u2019s diet or weight can negatively affect her body image.<\/p>\n<p>Mother\u2019s are not the only factors, of course, to a daughter\u2019s body image formation at puberty.\u00a0 Her father also plays a significant role. \u00a0\u00a0In fact, a father\u2019s withdrawal behavior within a conflict heavy marriage is a strong predictor of his daughter\u2019s early-onset physical development at puberty<sup>6<\/sup>, which has many negative emotional and physical consequences.\u00a0 And, a father\u2019s desire for thinness and his perfectionism are both related to long-term increased risk for his daughter having an eating disorder<sup>1<\/sup>.\u00a0 Interestingly, friends do not play as much of a role as once thought.\u00a0 Surprisingly no direct friend influence has been found on disordered eating<sup>7<\/sup>. But, girls who are already experiencing body image dissatisfaction do tend to perceive their friends as influencing their disordered eating behaviors, when in fact, the data seems to more strongly point to greater influence from her parents (and often more heavily weighted to her mother.)<\/p>\n<p>So what can we do as mothers to amplify our own body image satisfaction for ourselves at menopause and for our daughters at puberty?\u00a0 I believe that the first step is to begin to notice beauty at every opportunity in place of criticism.<\/p>\n<p>When you wake up tomorrow morning make a conscious decision to track how you judge yourself and other women in your world.\u00a0 Instead of glancing in the mirror to brush your teeth and noticing a new wrinkle, can you find something gorgeous about your face?\u00a0 Are your eyes glowing?\u00a0 Are you smiling?\u00a0 Can you see the beauty of generations of your family in your nose?<\/p>\n<p>When you pick your daughter up for basketball practice, find something stunning about one of the other moms in the carpool lane.\u00a0 How gorgeous are her teachers and coaches?\u00a0 After a week of this shift in perspective, what new discoveries have you made about the beauty of the real women in your life?\u00a0 How can you pass that perspective on to your daughter?\u00a0 Can she see her own beauty reflected in you?\u00a0 Can she see the beauty of the shy girl who sits alone at lunch?<\/p>\n<p>How will finding the beauty in every woman, change how all of us view the beauty in all women?<\/p>\n<p><strong><em>The transcript from our Menopause &amp; Puberty:\u00a0 A Dangerous Combo tweet chat is now available, <a title=\"Menopause &amp; Puberty Tweet Chat Transcript\" href=\"https:\/\/www.bepreparedperiod.com\/files\/1.11.13%20Puberty%20and%20Menopause%20-%20A%20Dangerous%20Combo.pdf\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">here<\/a>. Please v<em>isit the Be Prepared Period <a title=\"PeriodTalk Tweet Chat\" href=\"https:\/\/www.bepreparedperiod.com\/chat_post.php\"><em>Tweet Chat page<\/em><\/a> for more info about the next chat and its associated giveaway! Or start your own conversation over on our <a title=\"PeriodTalk\" href=\"https:\/\/www.bepreparedperiod.com\/PeriodTalk\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">PeriodTalk<\/a> forum (a safe place to ask your puberty and period questions)<br \/>\n<\/em><\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n<p><em><strong><br \/>\n<a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bepreparedperiod.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/01\/Jessica-Drummond-e1357437692780.jpg?ssl=1\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" data-attachment-id=\"1968\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/www.bepreparedperiod.com\/blog\/jessica-drummond\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bepreparedperiod.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/01\/Jessica-Drummond-e1357437692780.jpg?fit=175%2C209&amp;ssl=1\" data-orig-size=\"175,209\" data-comments-opened=\"1\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;0&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"Jessica Drummond\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-medium-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bepreparedperiod.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/01\/Jessica-Drummond-e1357437692780.jpg?fit=175%2C209&amp;ssl=1\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bepreparedperiod.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/01\/Jessica-Drummond-e1357437692780.jpg?fit=175%2C209&amp;ssl=1\" class=\"alignleft size-full wp-image-1968\" title=\"Jessica Drummond\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bepreparedperiod.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/01\/Jessica-Drummond-e1357437692780.jpg?resize=175%2C209&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"Jessica Drummond\" width=\"175\" height=\"209\" \/><\/a>Jessica Drummond<\/strong>, MPT, CCN, CHC, the founder of <a href=\"http:\/\/jessicadrummond.com\/\">jessicadrummond.com<\/a>, is\u00a0passionate about helping women and their daughters to optimize their hormone health. \u00a0Her clients love her expert support and integrative tools that make it easy for them to lose stubborn weight, calm their PMS and pelvic pain, get their sex drive back, and have great energy! \u00a0She specializes in working with tween and teen girls and their mothers to have healthy hormone cycles right from the start of puberty through menopause. Her signature programs <a href=\"http:\/\/jessicadrummond.com\/powerful-puberty-introduction\/\">Powerful Puberty<\/a> and <a href=\"http:\/\/jessicadrummond.com\/services\/\">Powerful and Sexy Woman<\/a> help her clients healthfully and happily navigate hormonal transitions.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>Jessica was educated at the University of Virginia, Emory University, The Institute of Integrative Nutrition and Duke Integrative Medicine. \u00a0She is currently a doctoral student in holistic nutrition at Hawthorn University.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>For free guides to Harnessing Your Hormones and Having Great Energy sign up at <a href=\"http:\/\/jessicadrummond.com\/\">jessicadrummond.com<\/a>.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>References:<\/p>\n<p>1. Canals, J., Sancho, C., &amp;Arija, M.V. (2009). Influence of parent\u2019s eating attitudes on eating disorders in school adolescents. <em>Eur Child Adolesc Psychiatry<\/em>, 18(6), 353-9. doi: 10.1007\/s00787-009-0737-9<\/p>\n<p>2. Karr, T.M., Davidson, D., Bryant F.B., Balague, G., &amp; Bohnert, A.M. (2012). Sport type and interpersonal and intrapersonal predictors of body dissatisfaction in high school female sport participants. <em>Body Image<\/em>, Dec 16. pii: S1740-1445(12)00139-8. doi: 10.1016\/j.bodyim.2012.11.001. [Epub ahead of print]\n<p>3. Lombardo, C., Battagliese, G., Lucidi, F., &amp; Frost, R.O. (2012). Body dissatisfaction among pre-adolescent girls is predicted by their involvement in aesthetic sports and by personal characteristics of their mothers. <em>Eat Weight Disord<\/em>, 17(2), e116-27.<\/p>\n<p>4. Rodgers, R., &amp; Chabrol, H. (2009). Parental attitudes, body image disturbance and disordered eating amongst adolescents and young adults: a review. <em>Eur Eat Disord Rev<\/em>, 17(2), 137-51. doi: 10.1002\/erv.907<\/p>\n<p>5. Schneider, S., Weib, M., Theil, A., Mayer, J., &amp; Hoffman, H. (2012). Body dissatisfaction in female adolescents: extent and correlates. <em>Eur J Pediatr<\/em>, Dec 4. [Epub ahead of print]\n<p>6. Saxbe, D.E., &amp; Repetti, R.L. (2009). Brief report: Fathers&#8217; and mothers&#8217; marital relationship predicts daughters&#8217; pubertal development two years later. <em>J Adolesc<\/em>, 32(2), 415-23. doi: 10.1016\/j.adolescence.2008.06.009. Epub 2008 Aug 15<\/p>\n<p>7. Rayner, K.E., Schniering, C.A., Rapee, R.M., &amp; Hutchinson, D.M. (2012). A Longitudinal Investigation of Perceived Friend Influence on Adolescent Girls&#8217; Body Dissatisfaction and Disordered Eating. <em>J Clin Child Adolesc Psychol<\/em>, Dec 5. [Epub ahead of print]\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>By Jessica Drummond, MPT, CCN, CHC Isn\u2019t it funny that God designed moms to hit menopause just as their daughters are hitting puberty.\u00a0 (Well, actually, I guess we\u2019ve designed it that way, since now many of us are having our children well into our perimenopausal years.\u00a0 But, wait\u2026 My grandmother had her last child at [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":16,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_bbp_topic_count":0,"_bbp_reply_count":0,"_bbp_total_topic_count":0,"_bbp_total_reply_count":0,"_bbp_voice_count":0,"_bbp_anonymous_reply_count":0,"_bbp_topic_count_hidden":0,"_bbp_reply_count_hidden":0,"_bbp_forum_subforum_count":0,"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[390,1,127],"tags":[532,533,534,535,536,537,178,538,181,539,396,45,540,29,541,35],"class_list":["post-1964","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-menopause2","category-periodtalk","category-puberty-2","tag-body-at-menopause","tag-hormonal","tag-hormonal-households","tag-hormone-cycles","tag-hormone-health","tag-jessica-drummond","tag-menopause","tag-menopause-and-puberty","tag-pelvic-pain","tag-perimenopausal","tag-perimenopause","tag-pms","tag-powerful-puberty","tag-puberty","tag-tweens","tag-tweet-chat"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Owning Your Beautiful Body for the Sake of Your Daughter<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Jessica is sharing a beautiful blog of Owning Your Beautiful Body (at Menopause) for the Sake of Your Daughter (at Puberty). Read here.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.bepreparedperiod.com\/blog\/owning-your-beautiful-body-at-menopause-for-the-sake-of-your-daughter-at-puberty\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Owning Your Beautiful Body for the Sake of Your Daughter\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Jessica is sharing a beautiful blog of Owning Your Beautiful Body (at Menopause) for the Sake of Your Daughter (at Puberty). Read here.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.bepreparedperiod.com\/blog\/owning-your-beautiful-body-at-menopause-for-the-sake-of-your-daughter-at-puberty\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Be Prepared. 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